Hello, my name is Gabrielle and I am surviving tender headed natural. Being tender headed seems to be only applied to children. The dread I got during wash day as I saw my mother preparing her
torture tools for ripping out detangling my hair is a staple memory. I was under the assumption that somehow we were supposed to grow out of being tender headed but for me, that was not the case. Many parts of my routine and natural hairstyles are determined by my tender headedness My hope is that through these tips I can save some fellow tender headed naturals and their children from unnecessary pain.
You have to slow down and work from the ends to root. This is one of the main culprits of pain for tender headed people. In another blog post, I wrote about having a set wash time. Making sure you have sufficient time will prevent you from being pressured to rip through your hair. Also, don’t do your hair if you are angry or tired.
2. Be thorough
Thoroughly saturate your strands in water and conditioner before detangling. I have seen some parents detangling on DRY HAIR and that is the worst. It not only is damaging but it’s super painful to not have some type of extra slip to help detangle. In my experience, thoroughly detangling makes the next detangling session easier.
3. Use the right tools
I am an ambassador for the big paddle brush. When I first started my natural hair journey I used a Denman brush and a comb for my natural hair, that was the most painful and time-consuming part of my journey. Using a comb is just not for me but, I know tons of other people who can’t use a paddle brush or who love combs. It’s all about your preference and what works for you.
4. Work in sections
This ties in perfectly with patience. Working in sections will help you from pulling on too many strands at one time. It will also help you to stay organized, thoroughly saturate and detangle your strands, and it will help you to speed up the whole process.
5. Avoid tension
I have a love-hate relationship with buns. A headache inducing bun is what spurred me to write this post! I have tried so many techniques to make a bun work and most of the time it ends in pain. It takes just one to many scrunchies or bobbie pins and I am in for a horrible headache. I also can’t wear too tight headbands or wigs.
The tip is to loosen it up. Every time I do a bun I take time to loosen it up a bit. Every time I do a style with bobbie pins I always check the placement just in case. Usually, we equate tightness with freshness, so you can use gel to give the allusion of a tighter style without causing extra stress to the hair and scalp. Also, beware of tight braids and twists, if it’s to the point where tension bumps show up and you have to buy painkillers to make it through the day, you need to loosen them up. In my opinion, super tight styles look uncomfortable and cause hair loss so just skip them!
Being tender headed is actually a blessing, it will keep you from ripping through your hair, wearing too tight hairstyles that cause tension damage, and over-styling your hair in general. Tell me down below about your tender headed memories and tips.